I started this post on September 29^th, one month to the day. I think I will actually post it today.

For a while I was thinking about and sharing choices I have had in the past, the decisions I made from those choices, and the ties that were broken as a result of some of those decisions. Although I didn’t realize it at the time, those decisions brought me freedom.

I am going to share an example of what looks like a relatively small choice and decision, but has had a great impact on my life. It all had to do with the making of my bed; something small, but very significant.

Here were my choices: Do I even make my bed? Well, if I decide to make my bed then how will I make it? Will I just toss the covers so they are spread out more, and not however they landed after my nocturnal tossing? Will I make it nice, but not tuck in the sheet all the way around? Will I make it nice and tuck the sheet in? If I tuck the sheet in, will I just tuck the sheet in at the foot of the bed, or all the way around the bed? If I just tuck the sheet in at the foot, will I make it a nice, secure tuck, or do I just stuff the sheet under the mattress at the foot, and be done with it?

Now, I understand you might be thinking, so what? What is the big deal? It’s simple really. Have you ever been in a place where you needed to take ownership of your life in a tangible way? Have you ever been in a place where life is out of control, and what should normally be a simple decision, is not? This place in life is the perfect place for the Lord to establish in you the ability to make a decision of your own choosing. You already have this ability, but when things are in an emotional upheaval it is very hard to see. Even when things are not crazy in life, it can be hard to see.

So here I am, getting frustrated about my bed making choices, and I decide my course of action. I choose to make my bed nice, with the sheet stuffed under the mattress at the foot of the bed. This does make for some nice and easy bed making! Just pull the covers up, and smooth out. All done. Now, if you don’t make your bed this way, I certainly don’t hold it against you. This is just how I make my bed.

This was a choice with no right or wrong decision. It was just a matter of me deciding how I prefer to make my bed. Now sometimes I don’t make my bed, and it looks really cozy every time I walk by it; just ready for me to jump in and take a nap. While at other times the sight of the unmade bed drives me up the wall, and I make it as soon as possible. Sometimes I even make my bed to please my husband, and that is freedom in itself because he has not placed that expectation upon me. He is simply happy to be home with his wife and child.

Of course, there are still times when bed-making legalism comes a-calling, and I have to decide how much I care if I bed is made or not. I usually choose to make my bed because to me it brings order and peace to my bedroom.

This decision, however simple, huge, stupid or whatever, was enough to plant in me the ability to make a decision from the choices laid out before me, and to decide for myself that my preference was allowed in my life. It also helped to lead me through breaking soul ties that would have kept me from moving forward into my destiny.

It is raining. I love hearing the rain come down. Change is here; it’s in our midst. I am still not sure what type of change it is, but I am thinking it is going to be BREAKTHROUGH!! I know Papa is cleaning out past thought patterns, generational curses and whatever else would like to hold us back from His purpose for us. Papa, I receive this new thing You are doing in our lives!!!

These are the lyrics for one of my favorite Delirious? song: Rain Down.

Looks like tonight, the sky is heavy
Feels like the winds are gonna change
Beneath my feet, the earth is ready
I know its time for heaven’s rain, it’s gonna rain

Cos it’s living water we desire
To flood our hearts with holy fire

Rain down all around the world we’re singing
Rain down can you hear the earth is singing
Rain down my heart is dry but still I’m singing
Rain down rain it down on me.

Back to the start, my heart is heavy
Feels like it’s time, to dream again
I see the clouds, and yes I’m ready
To dance upon this barren land
Hope in my hands

Do not shut, Do not shut, Do not shut the heavens
But open up, open up, open up our hearts

Give me strength to cross the water
Keep my heart upon Your altar
Give me strength to cross this water
Keep my feet don’t let me falter

3 years ago today my dad went to be with Jesus. I am thankful he is with the Him, but I miss my dad. So in honor of his memory, and because God is so good, I make new memories on this day. It is what my dad would have wanted, and the Lord meets me in it.

Making new memories came to me from another friend and her experiences. It helped to have something to look forward to that 1st year. So for the 1st year I took the day off from work, and went out with a friend. We toured the town of Waxhaw (so cute!) and had lunch. That night Jimbo gave me a pot of Mums, and other presents. The following year we bought a better car to drive Ahren around in, and we traveled up to NY. At 3 months old this was Ahren’s 1st road trip, and he had a lot of relatives to meet.

Today we went to Matthews, NC where Aunt Jane and some cousins live so Ahren could see his 1st parade; then we went back to Aunt Jane’s to have a nice afternoon visit. Ahren loves to play at Aunt Janes! After that we went to a friends house to celebrate her son’s 1st birthday, and Ahren played hard some more. It was a fun, full day.

In fact the past week has been a good week. The Lord is doing a new thing in our lives. The winds of change are blowing!!! Let’s see what will happen!

I keep remembering a phrase from The Chronicles of Narnia: “Aslan is on the move!”

Ahren in the Rain

It rained today!!! I woke up early this morning to the rain pounding on the window. Thank you Lord!!! I have been waiting for this rain for so long.  We have had enough rain to almost get the lake back to level and to lessen the drought status some, but it was still not enough.

I have felt that the lack of rain in the natural was a reflection of the lack of spiritual rain. In the midst of a great blessing in my life, the birth of my son Ahren, was the greatest test so far of entrusting myself, my heart, my desires…all of me to the Lord. I was in a spiritual drought.

I feel like this is the turning point. I called a friend to make sure she had the abundance of rain falling over her home. The phrase abundance of rain reminded her of the Carman song Abundance of Rain. Here is a little bit from the song:

Lately I’ve been feeling dry as a bone, like the Holy Spirit has
found a new home,
Yet, by faith, I still can see the cloud of glory that’s been so
familiar to me,
My spirit’s been dry and barren to rain,
Yet I hear the sound of the abundance of rain,
I’m hoping and a-trusting the drought will soon end, and the living
water will bubble again,
Well, I feel a rumble, I hear a crash, telling me the answer’s on the
way here at last,
I’m waiting for revival, soon to begin,
Yet I hear the sound of the abundance of rain.

I have been feeling for quite a while that change is coming, but it has been especially strong lately. In reflecting back to other times of change in my life I am reminded of how the Lord has carried me through. I do not know what is about to occur, but I know He will guide us through it.

I have set my heart to seek the Lord on all of this. (Even now the rain is starting back up again!!!! Pour down on us Lord!!!) I wonder what He is doing. It is significant to me also that 3 years ago this Saturday, my dad went to be with the Lord.

Papa, what is this new thing You are doing?

Today I had to press through to pray for what really needed to be prayed for. I was successful too, thanks to my Jesus and a friend calling at just the right time. The Lord is so good that way. I am so very glad it is not just coincidence; it’s Jesus!!

I want to say that I am going back to a place I was with the Lord, but it is so much more than that. I feel like I am going back to that place in the midst of going into a deeper place. I pray I never look at it casually when this happens. I love going deeper in the Lord. I love getting closer to Him with freedom, and none of the constraints that would liked to be strapped to me.

There is so much legalism that I have let go of, the old arguments going through my brain are gone; it’s just stopping, waiting, listening and moving forward.  Sometimes the old legalism wants to come back, new despair wants to set in…then comes my Comforter. Then I can move forward in the prayers He guides me in.

Thank you, Papa.